You know how I know you're gay? You listen to Coldplay

**HERO**
Coldplay Singer Gets Coldcocked

Cops nab Seattle woman after bizarre karaoke bar meltdown

AUGUST 10--A Washington man's karaoke performance of a Coldplay song apparently triggered a female bar patron to attack him early yesterday at a Seattle bar.

...When the assault victim launched into Coldplay's "Yellow," Lawrence allegedly told the man that his "singing sucked" and that the song "fucking sucked." She then grabbed at the man's microphone and "pushed him and punched him in order to get him to stop singing," cops reported.

...It is unclear why Coldplay's music apparently made Lawrence snap, though a famous June 2005 New York Times appraisal by Jon Pareles may offer an insight. The critic called the British group "the most insufferable band of the decade," adding that, "the lyrics can make me wish I didn't understand English."